Major Change

With time, comes change. Everything changes over time; buildings weather, seas rise, people age. The magnitude of change varies, though. A rock cannot decide to be cut faster under a waterfall, but we as sentient beings, and further more of higher intelligence (I use this term loosely) can choose to what degree of change we bring into our lives.

People often distinguish between living and existing. What is the difference exactly? Existence basically is just "going with the flow", letting the tides push you along in life. "Whatever happens, happens" is what they usually say. People who merely exist, don't take action. They sit around and wait until everything falls into place. They take things as they come.

Living, however, requires more work. There has to be intent and action. People who merely sits and dreams of change is an idealist; people who take action without intent (goals) are lost. If you want to live, you have to develop; you have to grow, be it for better or worse.

No one said that change is always good. Sometimes people change for the worse. I read somewhere before about the 90/10 principle. Basically it's about how you "control your destiny" by controlling your reactions. Won't go into detail, more here http://harrycheese.blogspot.com/2007/11/9010-principle-good-in-theory-dumb-in.html .

Whether it's dumb in reality or really practical is entirely subjective. I tend towards the more positive side, and would agree with the person who came up with this principle. It's a good thing to live by. Anyway back to the topic on change.

As I was saying, self-improvement is necessary if you want to "live". They say the quest for knowledge is for a lifetime. While this MAY be true (who knows?), seeking knowledge for the sake of is totally redundant. What we should be seeking for is how to apply the knowledge we obtain to better ourselves. This is why for a long time, I gave up my reading habit. I realized what I was doing was just reading to know more, and as a result, often got into debates (or what most might call arguments) with people over things that even if they did matter, weren't relevant.

Strangely enough this epiphany came to me while I was in my BMT phase, and I'm glad it did. My endless pursuit of age-old philosophical arguments have come to a standstill. I know what I needed to know, but now it's what I do with that knowledge. I'm not saying I totally stopped learning, but I no longer force-feed my mind with endless pages of words that my subconscious would probably force into the archival recesses of my mind, never to be referred to again.

So, starting in baby steps, I began to make changes in my life. Some changes were bad, most were good. Bad in the sense that given a choice, I wouldn't want to make those changes. But sometimes we have to walk the road of darkness before we can really appreciate the saving grace of the light. Seek up, is what they usually say. But we have to be down before we can look towards the heavens.

But I can say, in regards to the overall picture, this change that I am aiming towards is ultimately a good thing (to me that is). Many might contest it because, frankly, it's against what most people would agree with. It's not necessarily a bad thing, because shouldn't we all be hated? If the world agrees with you, then it's likely you're doing something wrong. Anti-social or social? It's not really my concern. My concern is solely whether or not it's beneficial to me (think long-term, as in reeeeeeeeeally long-term. like eternity-long-term).

So after talking about all that nonsense, I guess you might (or not) know what I'm heading towards. What it is exactly, I will not reveal yet. In due time. But just know that it's a major change in my life. Do not worry. I'm not gonna kill myself. The new year is soon approaching. Make your resolutions, stick to it. I'm just having a head start because I need it.

There are only 2 things that are important to me: Music and Love, both of which are who God is.